Divorced single parent dating
The real answer is: As a single parent I have responsibilities to my kids that will trump all plans 100% of the time.However, I will never use those same responsibilities to disrespect you or avoid my commitment and responsibilities to you.Everyone’s agenda and desires take a backseat to the first aid and trauma response. Whatever the situation, the Mom is incommunicado, a problem that might need to be addressed at a different time, and a solution needs to be provided. If your divorced dad is always breaking plans because their kid is sick, getting an award, has a recital… When used in relationship the “excuse” is often used to recover from a miss of some sort. The kids got home and all hell broke loose.” That might be okay, if your call was just a “nighty night” check-in, but if you were scheduled to talk about living arrangements, that might be an example of using the kids as an excuse for not taking responsibility.(“Your daughter has fallen on the playground and needs to see a doctor.”) And beware that many requests can be setup like a crisis, (“Dad, I need my science binder by 3rd period tomorrow, I left it at your house.”) when they are actually poorly formed requests. SCENARIO THREE: THE EX DROPS THE BALL “Dad, I need someone to pick me up after the cross-country meet and I can’t get Mom to pick up.” Things happen. And between strained ex-parents, there can be some manipulation and control going on. “Okay, count on me to be there if we can’t get your Mom to respond. But OF COURSE, go to your cross-country race, we will figure it out.”SCENARIO FOUR: I’D REALLY RATHER… Well, you might want to see why you’re no longer a priority. Make sure the two of you have a chance to establish enough rapport that you can ask, “Dude, if you don’t want to go to this event with me, just say it.” Kids can be the easy way out. SCENARIO SIX: PLAYFUL KIDS WILL BE KIDS ONLY SO LONG Kids are our singular priority as parents.I don’t think I will always do this, and there are certain moments when the phone definitely needs to be turned off, but while my kids are still in pre-college school, I’m at least going to make sure there is no emergency. But then there is my response and my boundaries with both my kids and my ex that must be understood and enforced as well. But when the text dings and it is, in fact, one of my kids… Let’s take this from the perspective of a FIRST DATE, rather than a developing relationship.In a first date you are trying to make an impression.There are plenty of single parents who use their kids to get out of almost every obligation. exercise, dating, taking responsibility for their own actions.And I have been the dad who apologized for checking his phone when a text dinged while on a date.
However, with a date who is not a single mom, the same rule applies.A woman responded to one of my Single Dad Want posts with a very moving and impassioned comment. Your man, your divorced dad, is lucky to have someone so understanding.